Please do a clicky and check out the webpage made of win I stumbled upon today, Crazy Things Parents Say.
An example, for my avid readers.
Grandma: I don’t get all the fuss about contraceptive. Condoms are evil.
Me: Then how did you manage to have only four kids?
Grandma: Anal sex, sweetie. Before God blessed me with menopause, your grandfather had a long affair with my butt. And it was just as good.