5.17.2010

Okay, then.

So. Where to even begin?
Today was a monday. Guh. I really hate Mondays.
I told you something was going to poop. Ha! I'm psychic.


Three years ago my family was hit with the biggest blow ever. My dad wanted to get a divorce. He simply couldn't keep it up anymore. The effect it had on my entire family was just tragic. My mom was crushed. My two oldest brothers are technically my half-brothers and (to my understanding) it freaked them out that their relationship with my dad would change. The youngest of my older brother didn't leave the house at all apparently. I wouldn't know for sure though; I came home every other day to change my clothes and then I left again.

After some soul searching my dad realized he was severely depressed, and that it wasn't really a divorce he was after, per se. Mom and dad went on a vacation in Scotland (lucky bastards) and made out behind a braille school. They came home and decided to work on their marriage like never before. And they sure did. They worked their asses off.

But sometimes, you gotta know when to let go.
So now it's official. My parents are getting divorced. For real this time. And looking back over the last six months, I got to say, it's probably for the best, and I'm glad that it's done now and not in two years time when they've gotten bitter and don't like each other anymore. We're still gonna be a family. The dynamics of that family is still uncertain, and even though that scares me, I know we can get through whatever rough patches might appear.

It's quite amusing really.
I think it's a testimony to how incredibly fucked up I was three years ago that upon recieving the news of their mother's impending divcorce, my two oldest brothers both ask if mom told me, how she told me and how I'm taking it. They both called, separately, and asked if I was OK. Andi even went Survival Technique on me and told me to eat, drink and sleep.

But I'm really Not Cracking. Sure, it was shitty news, and I hyperventilated for a bit, then I cried on the bus home to mom, but once I had calmed myself down.. Yeah. Mom and I talked about all sorts of stuff. We even laughed.

I went home. Took a bath. Told Ceit and Virre. Got a bit of a headache and thougt I'd take a nap - ended up sleeping for 4 hours. Woke up and went to the grocery store. The sun was out, for like the first time in two weeks. (It's MAY, goddamnit. Screw you, Iceland, you and your effin' volcano.) I listened to Springsteen and had a few cigarettes, and found myself not being miserable.

Life goes on. I've come a long way since 2007. And sometime soon, I'm gonna share an apartment with my mom. Hey. Who knew?

2 comments:

Haje said...

Yay ;-)
SÅ MYCKET KÄRLEK ATT DET RINNER ÖVER

Fladdormamman - gravid igen said...

Tänker på er allihopa!!! Puss